My 25 yr old daughter moved back home while searching for a new job. It took many months before she would accept a job because she has her masters degree & most jobs available were "beneath" her. Huh?? We pay most of her bills including her cell phone, car insurance, medical bills, perscriptions, gasoline just to name a few. Her cat is a long haired temperamental cat that she hoodwinked me out of $500 to get her. She comes & goes as she pleases, doesn't clean up after herself, talks to me like I'm a doormat and gets verbally abusive if I ask her to help around the house. Obviously, the problem is that she is a spoiled brat & I know it's my fault so recently, I've been telling her that I'm not going to take her abuse anymore & she in turn tells me & other family members that I'm crazy & verbally attacked her for no reason so they feel sorry for her. Another huh? My mom is disabled & begs for her to come see her (she lives next door) but my daughter says she's gross & doesn't want her to bother her. As if all of the above is not bad enough, she refuses to clean her cats litter box so the cat will poop in random places in the house (she seems to prefer the kitchen!) I've had breast cancer & after treatments, I could never stomach cleaning the litter box without violently gaging but if I didn't, the entire house would stink. A couple of days ago, I told her I was done with her attitude & if she couldn't do any better, she needed to move out & I would disconnect her phone. Her response? She packed an overnight bag & left so, as promised, I disconnected her phone. Now she says she hates me & I will never see her again. My entire family is mad at me because "she may have car trouble (in her new Volvo sports car) & wouldn't be able to call someone for help" I'm starting to think maybe I am crazy since nobody is emphasizing with my position. I really need some advice or encouragement. PLEASE HELP!
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Twinkles
Posts:
5
Registered:
9/26/11
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(2 of 2)
Re: 25 yr old daughter & her cat moved back home
Sep 26, 2011 4:40 PM
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Helping others is a matter of of teaching them to help themselves.
I'm not a parent, but there has to come a point where enough is enough.
The fact that she was living back at home and was not pulling her weight, is just pathetic, and should NOT be tolerated.
I think people tend to forget, that emotional abuse is NOT always to a parent to a child, but can go the other way as well.
I think you have done the right thing, though other may not agree. She had ample time to get her act together. People have to remember, she was living at YOUR home, not the other way around.
Not to mention, if she is refusing to get a job because they are "beneath" her, she needs to get over herself. Work is work, and as far as the cell phone thing goes. A cell is a privilege NOT a right.
As for the family that is not agreeing with your decision, tell them to get off their high horses, and let her mooch off of them, and see how long before they get sick of it. If they are not willing to do that, then tell them, they have NO room to talk.
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Sad in Alabama
Posts:
1
From:
Florence, AL
Registered:
9/25/11
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(1 of 2)
25 yr old daughter & her cat moved back home
Sep 25, 2011 9:18 PM
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My 25 yr old daughter moved back home while searching for a new job. It took many months before she would accept a job because she has her masters degree & most jobs available were "beneath" her. Huh?? We pay most of her bills including her cell phone, car insurance, medical bills, perscriptions, gasoline just to name a few. Her cat is a long haired temperamental cat that she hoodwinked me out of $500 to get her. She comes & goes as she pleases, doesn't clean up after herself, talks to me like I'm a doormat and gets verbally abusive if I ask her to help around the house. Obviously, the problem is that she is a spoiled brat & I know it's my fault so recently, I've been telling her that I'm not going to take her abuse anymore & she in turn tells me & other family members that I'm crazy & verbally attacked her for no reason so they feel sorry for her. Another huh? My mom is disabled & begs for her to come see her (she lives next door) but my daughter says she's gross & doesn't want her to bother her. As if all of the above is not bad enough, she refuses to clean her cats litter box so the cat will poop in random places in the house (she seems to prefer the kitchen!) I've had breast cancer & after treatments, I could never stomach cleaning the litter box without violently gaging but if I didn't, the entire house would stink. A couple of days ago, I told her I was done with her attitude & if she couldn't do any better, she needed to move out & I would disconnect her phone. Her response? She packed an overnight bag & left so, as promised, I disconnected her phone. Now she says she hates me & I will never see her again. My entire family is mad at me because "she may have car trouble (in her new Volvo sports car) & wouldn't be able to call someone for help" I'm starting to think maybe I am crazy since nobody is emphasizing with my position. I really need some advice or encouragement. PLEASE HELP!
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