How can I help my daughter ?
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0]
Hello,
It's a long story .I have two kids a 13 years old boy and a 16 years old daughter in grade 11 this year.
Ever since her birth , we had major problems . we were not a good family. Having to live with my mother , with a husband who usually in bad terms with my mother , it was difficult for us to raise the two kids with the interference of her and despite the fact that she loves them the most but in her own way.As a result , I began having episodes of severe anger and depression but denied the treatment for many reasons . So I started treating my daughter in a harsh way and then I start crying feeling awful after each time I treat her badly. She was born with a teeth problem and was sometimes bullied for this from other kids . My job made me distant from my husband and kids .
Until we managed to move on to another place away from mother , and my daughter now is 16 with her teeth fixed properly . But the problem is not over. I reached for therapy for two years now and decided to stop it and try on my own.
The problem is that my daughter is not at all in good terms with me always shouting , screaming and shooting hurting words to me every time I disagree with any of her demands. She became increasingly nervous and demanding . Rarely talks with her brother and COMPLETELY ignoring her father.
Lately , she made a huge and scary episode in which she told her father every kind of insults to him and his family as well.
He stood up in silence but when she started to threw things in our faces , he had to held her hands strongly so as not to hurt herself.
It was a frightening and nasty incident from which , we couldn't recover or forget till now.
I reached out for professional help but each time I talk to a psychologist or a psychiatrist , they always ask for her to be with me but of course she refused and looked at me as if I am mad.
The real problem here is that she doesn't talk to her father at all , in fact she had been like this for more than a year , she avoids meeting him even at home . If he is in the kitchen , then she won't come in unless he moves out and so on .
Another fact which is strange , outside her family and away from us , she is the perfect example of a teen .Her teachers , friends and her friends' families are always praising her for good behavior and the way she dresses up .
Good people, what can I do ? Am I going to see her acting in a normal way one day with me , her brother and most of all her dad ?
If she's acting like that outside , then why the opposite with us at home?
Is she going to forget and forgive us for any misbehaviors from us as her parents?
Of course there are lots of kids who were badly treated as kids , do they hate their parents and never forget and continue with their wars with their parents with no mercy?
What should I do ? Ignore her hateful acts and pretend as if nothing's happening ? Or ground her every time she misbehaves and utters bad words to us?
Do I need to see a psychiatrist for myself ?
I am sorry for the long message , but I am really desperate and in need of good advices that can really make a change .
God bless.
It's a long story .I have two kids a 13 years old boy and a 16 years old daughter in grade 11 this year.
Ever since her birth , we had major problems . we were not a good family. Having to live with my mother , with a husband who usually in bad terms with my mother , it was difficult for us to raise the two kids with the interference of her and despite the fact that she loves them the most but in her own way.As a result , I began having episodes of severe anger and depression but denied the treatment for many reasons . So I started treating my daughter in a harsh way and then I start crying feeling awful after each time I treat her badly. She was born with a teeth problem and was sometimes bullied for this from other kids . My job made me distant from my husband and kids .
Until we managed to move on to another place away from mother , and my daughter now is 16 with her teeth fixed properly . But the problem is not over. I reached for therapy for two years now and decided to stop it and try on my own.
The problem is that my daughter is not at all in good terms with me always shouting , screaming and shooting hurting words to me every time I disagree with any of her demands. She became increasingly nervous and demanding . Rarely talks with her brother and COMPLETELY ignoring her father.
Lately , she made a huge and scary episode in which she told her father every kind of insults to him and his family as well.
He stood up in silence but when she started to threw things in our faces , he had to held her hands strongly so as not to hurt herself.
It was a frightening and nasty incident from which , we couldn't recover or forget till now.
I reached out for professional help but each time I talk to a psychologist or a psychiatrist , they always ask for her to be with me but of course she refused and looked at me as if I am mad.
The real problem here is that she doesn't talk to her father at all , in fact she had been like this for more than a year , she avoids meeting him even at home . If he is in the kitchen , then she won't come in unless he moves out and so on .
Another fact which is strange , outside her family and away from us , she is the perfect example of a teen .Her teachers , friends and her friends' families are always praising her for good behavior and the way she dresses up .
Good people, what can I do ? Am I going to see her acting in a normal way one day with me , her brother and most of all her dad ?
If she's acting like that outside , then why the opposite with us at home?
Is she going to forget and forgive us for any misbehaviors from us as her parents?
Of course there are lots of kids who were badly treated as kids , do they hate their parents and never forget and continue with their wars with their parents with no mercy?
What should I do ? Ignore her hateful acts and pretend as if nothing's happening ? Or ground her every time she misbehaves and utters bad words to us?
Do I need to see a psychiatrist for myself ?
I am sorry for the long message , but I am really desperate and in need of good advices that can really make a change .
God bless.
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mrsteapot
Posts:
1
From:
Egypt
Registered:
11/13/11
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