perplexed, I so do understand what you're saying and feeling. I too knocked myself out trying to give my kids and my family the best I could give them only to be accused of things I never did or said. Had we done this to our parents our families would not have spoke to us. My whole family knows what my daughter is doing, they stay away for the most part after they have been burned one by one, but no one has turned their back to her and stood up to her lies. The new generation has brought alot of disrespect that parents today take. While the oldest daughter needs a good taste of reality, I am not the one that will be able to give that to her. I haven't blocked accts or numbers but after the whole FaceBook thing I have gone to a no contact status. I don't feel guilty or bad about it either. If this was a supposed "friend" that had done us this way, we would not have anything morfe to do with the friend but because it's our own flesh and blood we keep trying and keep hoping for the best. My daughter has 3 kids and that makes it even harder for me.

perplexed.....yes, I have thought of my daughter as evil too. The things she has done are deliberate and hateful. Her intent is to hurt me and to get others to hate me, something I cannot comprehend. I see it nothing short of evil.

Annette

Thank you guys so much....you have been my sanity and salvation. Yes, my husband is so understanding and patient with me and my daughter. He says it's almost like she has it out for me--the one person who's been there 150% from the beginning. Yesterday, she called my phone like nothing happened asking me random question. My husband took my phone and told her 'your mom doesn't want to speak to you" . She hung up on him. She is mad because her power is being taken away. Luckliy, my husband phoned my ex and they worked it out for her to stay with him and his wife for a while. We just want to make sure she has a place to lay her head because she is never welcome to stay here again. For once I actually feel liberated!

I'm sorry that your daughter did that to you and now you are in fear of your life. That is how I have felt on more than one occasion with my daughter. I used to lock my bedroom door and sleep with some type of protection next to me in bed because I was scared of what she would do.

Smart move to get the restraining order. Not that a piece of paper is going to protect us if our children decide to get violent, but it helps if you need to get police assistance because they have gone off on you!

It is no wonder our children feel justified in acting in such a horrible manner because it is in our face with magazine's, radio and television. You almost have to live in a bubble not to hear or see some of the crap that is happening out there. Just this morning on the Today Show is a story of a man who got stabbed while helping a woman who was being mugged. Instead of anyone helping him, or calling 9-1-1, he laid on the sidewalk in public for over an hour before help arrived. The whole incident was video taped and it shows people walking past him and someone who actually touched him to see how badly he was hurt only to walk off. I hoped it was an isolated incident before they cited five other incidents of a similar nature.

I hope your husband is kind and understanding of this type of behavior. Your ex is like most who want to push blame for not being there and for not being proactive. I have an ex who likes to blame, but I ignore his rants. Easier said that done, but laugh at the ignorance and know you did the best job you could in a world gone mad.

Oh my, I think I gave you the wrong impression. I am not for these girls acting this way....not for one second would I believe or want anyone to fall victim to their lies and bad mouthing their mothers. I too have a daughter who is 19 and who abused me for the last seven years and finally moved out of the house a year ago. Since she moved out, I have found out things that made me feel like the worst parent in the world. Some of the things I have confirmed about her have made my hair curl and my stomach turn. Please don't think for a moment that I don't feel everyone's pain in this chat room or don't know the pain these kids give to their parents because I am one of them.

Does it ever end and how does a parent deal with it? My 29 daughter has been a handful since her dad left us when she was 6. She started trying to turn poeple against me at that point, making me the villan and her the victim, trying to get sympathy from anyone that would listen.

Almost 5 years ago it came out that her stepbrother had sexually abused her for 5 years.....I figured that was what had happened and I was behind her 100%, to the point that I cut ties with my inlaws and my stepson to support my daughter. She and I talked for hours and never once did she sway from her story that she had been victomized.

After this all came out, the first time my daughter got mad at me, she went running to her stepbrother and have been in touch ever since. He is giving her the support she needs from me. He won't have anything to do with his dad or I as we have done him wrong.

I have 3 daughters, and the 24 year old recently told me that my 29 year old is still actively filling their stepbrother's head with lies to continue his support and sympathy towards her, and his hate towards me. If this really hd happened the way she claimed I don't think she would have went back to him at all and I now question the truth.

Last week, 29 year old daughter posted pics on FaceBook of my youngest and the stepbrother at his graduation and I have no doubt in my mind that she did this to try and reconnect the two and to get at me, knowing there is no relationship between the stepbrother and us. She then told her 24 year old sister that she knew it was going to make me mad. Now my youngest and the stepbrother are now "friends."

My husband (her stepdad) beleives my daughter is trying to unite the family against me, and has been for years.

Without just saying, "there is no sense to make of this becuase it is typicla behavior," is there anyone that can tell me what is happening here?

She has also recently connected with her ex, she had been trying to take away his parental rights claiming he was abusive and got a couselor to make a statement indicating this which she took to court. She put him thru all kinds of grief and now she has flipped 100% the other way.....she is remarried and has been for several years, has 2 more children by her second husband. She invited her ex to their daughter's b.day party which meant he traveled 500 miles for this and then they were smearing salad dressing on each other, eating off each other's plates, laughing and flirting like lovers.

Her buiness is hers and I don't get into her stuff but what does concern me is I do feel the reason she tried to reunite her stepbrother and my youngest (13) is she will have the support to turn my 13 year old against me. She tried to alienate me from my grandmother but she saw thru her game. She was able to alienate me from my parents for awhile but then she burned them and they then saw the truth. We have 5 kids total and she has tried with every sibling to turn them against me. She has managed with the one stepbrother and the other stepbother kind of plays it cool with both sides. Only one daughter hsn't fallen for the games (my 24 year old) and up until this point my 13 year old hasn't been involved dues to the difference in age.

I'd really like some advise on how to handle this.

Annette

Hi I'm back AGAIN......I have to be the MOST foolish mother there is. I was a BIG FOOL this time and now I am paying for it!!!!! My UNGRATEFUL daughter got thrown our of her apartment a month ago. After not gettinga freakin job to pay rent. Of course, my wonderful husband,her step-dad, agreed that she should move back in for awahile to recoup and save. Well, the first week she came we were out of town on vacation. I was apprehensive about leaving her in my house alone. But I put my trust in God. Day one was good,day two,day three then on the fifth day I call to check on her and my dogs. She's throwing a tantrum and calling me names and saying I am the reason for all of her bad decisions and so on. Well, my husband jumps in and talks to her she calms down and apologizes. I thought all was well. And it was after we returned. For about three weeks. My husband told her she woould have to work,at least part-time,while living here. I was cooking for her all. I was happy to have her here. Then she began to accuse me and her step-father of all kinds of VILE things. She began to pick on me every chance she got. I would be reading then she would just come and sit at the end of the sofa and wait to say something to start a fight. Anyway, last night I KICKED HER OUT ON THE STREET!!! One part of my is scared but as she kept telling me "is was a mistake for her to move in with us". So now she's gotten her wish. I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!!! It has wreaked havoc on my mental health in ONE MONTH. These types of children ARE TOXIC!!!!!

I feel for you. One of ours daughters thinks she is so much better than her parents. She is sooooo very touchy and we can't understand why as we don't tell her ANYthing. We just smile and go along with her ideas. She acts like she has a LARGE chip on her shoulders. She seems to feel entitled to just about everything from number of children to a bigger house, etc. We have given her a LOT of money over the years and during that time she tried to act nice but even then I could sense the burn. We are ashamed of her and her mouth and emails to us.
Rude, rude, rude. If she did not have the 2 granddaughters, we could enjoy NOT dealing with her. It's so sad. She is soooo selfish and does nothing for us but criticize me.