Throwing in my two cents in a little different way... since the most recent post addresses the "angst and anger of today's teens" I'll speak a bit as an educator with three young kids.

The answer "DON'T GO ONLINE" doesn't cut it for several reasons:

1. It lets the jerks rule the roost. You can't let the people who flame and troll and act completely inappropriately drive out people who are perhaps just learning, or want to be left alone.

2. Kids "in the know" should band together and help self-monitor and address the issues as their raised. Yeah... if you know what you're doing you can probably steal accounts and passwords, and I know that teens do that. But why turn to the "dark side of the Net" when you can do something productive with your life? Helping people and making them happy will serve you better in the longrun than destroying people (online or not).

3. If kids (and yeah, I'm including teens here) want to be haters, and others don't reproach them... then you're leaving it up to people you really don't want involved (namely us adults) to come in and set limits. Believe me, most of us have much better things to do than discipline our own kids, let alone some online punkster.

4. My focus is always on finding good and cool things to do online... and yeah... that even means on MySpace. I'm not about shutting it down *at all*. Indeed, I actively campaign against the DOPA (Delete Online Predators Act) because of the chilling effect it has on education. Check out my profile and you'll see profiles like "Youth Against Poverty" and another against genocide. Getting involved *there* might turn into a very cool Internet project for *any student*. But does anyone discuss this?

5. We're adults... you're not. I was a teen.. you haven't been an adult. Respect? I respect that you probably have a great deal of online savvy and experience. But neither you (nor any of us) know it *all*. Indeed, most of the adults here probably do have a lot more online experience than you do. I started in 1994 at Richmond High. How old were you then? I got kids who read 6 levels below grade published internationally. Do you think I'm one who wants to shut down the Net?

You are probably used to a number of adults who really act out of ignorance, and they take a "Just Say No" approach to anything they don't understand (namely the Net here). You and I both know that doesn't work. So... what are *you* doing online to make this a better world? If you tell me you play a lot of games (which may or may not actually be something you could turn into a Net project) or just hang out... then whatever. If on the other hand you're interested in checking out http://www.takingitglobal.org or http://www.nabuur.com then maybe we can talk about how I can help you get credit in your English and/or History class.

Your frustration is understandable, as is your anger. You're venting here and lumping pretty much all adults in the same bag... what some of you don't understand is that the adults here are for the most part very sincere and spend a lot of time trying to make the Net a very cool and interesting place for students, or are other adults who just come here looking for help. Rant on if you need to... but understand where your rhetoric will take you and reconsider before you post... remember... it will be here (or somewhere googled) for eternity.

Regards,

Jeff Cooper
Tapped In Helpdesk
Education Technology Support Consultant
jbcoops@yahoo.com at MySpace

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Edited by jbcoops at 09/11/2006 1:33 PM

Here's an idea:

DON'T GO ONLINE!

Why not tell her to not make a big deal out of it and not care what these two girls think. To be honest, I don't care what anyone but my friends think about me, and contemplating suicide because of cyber-bullying is taking matters way way way too far.

(This posting was edited by Larry to remove an offensive reference. There was no change in meaning). Sorry Son of Liberty but we do try to maintain some community standards. If you find my editing offensive, please let me know and I'll just delete your comment -- Larry).

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Edited by Larry at 08/14/2006 4:07 PM

After reading the subject about internet bullying and about the profiles of the teacher which had something put on myspace about, I would like you to read my story and see if there is anything you can do to help me.

My 15 year old daughter is being harrassed over the internet by two girls who by the way harrassed her enough to get phone numbers changed and for my daughter to avoid all places where these two girls go. Tonight it was brought to my daughters attention that a myspace was created about her giving pictures of her, where she lived and her age. The profile had awful comments written about her and horrible things said about her. My daughter has already had a tough road for the past year and suicide was always on her mind. Now this is happening! To a 15 year old to have her name and picture out there for everyone to see and for all the horrible things to be written about her it is devastating.I went to the police department and maybe you can help there has to be a law they are breaking and how do I get myspace to take it off their site and better yet how do I stop the girls from creating another one. I understand that you can turn off a computer and ignore im and emails but for a profile to be created and for all your friends to see and for other people that arent so nice to make comments is horrible. Can you help me? Do you know what laws are being broken. Do you know what To do to stop these two horrible people that would cause such pain to my daughter?

Linda
mysnshn@msn.com

Although I agree that there is way too much emphasis on the negative side of the Net, you can't just turn your machine off and avoid cyberbullying. Well, I suppose you could opt to completely ignore everything and anything that others said about you, and not being an expert on cyberbullying, I can only imagine what kids (and adults) do to each other online (stalking, posting nastygrams everywhere, spamming your email, DOS your site, etc.)... sure... there's lots that one could do. But to what end?

Just to make someone else's life miserable? It's a pretty sad state of affairs that people need to try and destroy someone else (online or elsewhere) to fulfill some need within themself. I know that sites like MySpace do indeed have some sort of peer monitoring and there are steps to be taken to moderate/mediate disputes between members (I think MySpace encourages schools to set up groups for such eventualities). Of course, all this misses the main point.

It's not about turning the machine off to solve any of these problems. It's about turning students onto productive and proactive uses of the Net which are far more rewarding than flaming someone because they looked at you weird during lunch.

Trouble is that most (if not all) of the coverage and emphasis about what to do on the Net is negative (Dateline with cyberpredators, the DOPA Act, etc.). No wonder that kids are doing nasty things... we're modeling it for them without giving them positive alternatives.

Thanks for the links, Nick. Glad you're here and posting.

Unfortunately, cyberbullying seems to be fairly universal, and people on this side of the Pond can benefit from what has been learned (and done!) in the UK to address it - particularly on mobile phones, which have even bigger uptake among youth over there.

I think the social networks are going to need a lot of help with this going forward - we're all going to need to pitch in, including teens, with their needed expertise of having been through or near the issues in the Web context. See this advice from a young person who went through a huge bullying nightmare, online and offline (the article is "Bullying & cyberbullying: Samantha's story"). If any teens in this forum have been through online bullying experiences, please share what you've learned.

Anne
BlogSafety co-director