People, stop using filtering software on you're kids. Eventually, they'll get a scewed perspective on life and the world if you sugarcoat everything. By doing things like censoring everything bad in the world you are censoring reality itself, therefore you are weakening the nation, and how will a bunch of babies that have been fed lies that the world is all good and no bad defend this country? They won't. There is porn, there is murder, there is theft, there is genocide. Teach them that, but if you don't want you're kid to have a cold outlook on life, you need to also tell them about the good in the world, but not via fascists like Websense. If reality is censored, then nobody will be able to stand up and defend themselves if need be, and only people like Hitler and Stalin will come to power, and there will be no one to stop them. Talk to you're kids about sex, and why they should wait until marriage, and don't sugarcoat the repricussions of not doing so. If they don't learn from you, they will learn from their friends, and who would you rather have teaching you're child, you or them?
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Larry
Posts:
136
From:
Silicon Valley, California
Registered:
6/19/06
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(10 of 10)
Aug 14, 2006 4:02 PM
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I think the question of whether to use a filter has to be answered on a case by case basis. In general, I think they're not a good idea for teenagers for a number of reasons including:
1. it can violate trust
2. teens can get around them or go to another device
3. by the time someone has reached their teens, they should have internalized the values rather than having their parents rely on filters.
Having said this, I can't speak for all families. There are certainly cases where teens do need a bit of extra "help" that a filter can provide. So there are cases where it can be appropriate.
I think filters can also be appropriate with younger children who may be quite upset by certain types of content that they can stumble upon.
Larry
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Larry
Co-director
BlogSafety.com
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son of liberty
Posts:
94
From:
anytown, USA
Registered:
6/28/06
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(9 of 10)
Aug 14, 2006 3:32 PM
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son of liberty
Posts:
94
From:
anytown, USA
Registered:
6/28/06
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(8 of 10)
Aug 14, 2006 3:04 PM
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Micheal, one of the reasons for kids spending more time on the computer is because it was one of the last pockets of our privacy. But, with the Cyber-Gestapo (Websense) even that isn't working anymore (thank God my parents do not use that stuff). And to be honest Parker, I really couldn't care less how offended you are about my opinions, because I am infinitely more offended at yours, internet filters make me sick. It's people like you who will ruin everything because you have a minor grievance with it.
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Michael
Posts:
5
From:
Pennsylvania
Registered:
8/10/06
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(7 of 10)
Aug 14, 2006 8:08 AM
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Baker Family,
As a new parent I totally understand where you're coming from. A good tactic that was told to me was to not have the computer isolated so anyone can view the screen at any time or to have the screen positioned so that it faces into the room where people generally sit. I use that tactic at school and it keeps my students on their toes most of the time. I do remind myself that I was young once too and curious. I still remember lowering the volume on the TV so my parents wouldn't hear the curses when I was watching a Richard Pryor performance or some movie I knew they wouldn't approve. I also remember having talks with my parents about the movies we saw if they thought it was needed. I think that was the key.
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Michael
Posts:
5
From:
Pennsylvania
Registered:
8/10/06
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(6 of 10)
Aug 14, 2006 7:37 AM
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SOL,
I agree with your point about educating your children about the realities of the world and not sugarcoating it. However the reality is that most kids spend more time watching TV or on the computer than with their parents. Right or wrong that's the way it is. If you watch the news you find one common theme..."If it bleeds, it leads". The news is filled with bad news and TV is filled with controversy and sex because THEY SELL. The industries aren't interested in your values. They are only interested in making a profit. When was the last time you saw the first story on the evening news or cable news to be about "good news"? News broadcasts END with the positive human interest story and by then most people have already turned the TV off and gone to bed. Positive stories are on page 40 while the rapist or murderer makes the front page. I'm not saying it's right but the way it is. Parents need all the tools they can to balance the bombardment of negatvity kids see today. But the parent element has to be there.
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BakerFamily
Posts:
4
From:
AZ
Registered:
8/11/06
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(5 of 10)
Aug 13, 2006 7:33 PM
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We have two 16 year old daughters and a 13 year old son. They know what porn is but I don't want them to have access to it. I think it is good to block them from getting on to porn sites. A parent who didn't care about their kids would allow them to watch that stuff. I'm very insulted that you think it's wrong for me to block my children from seeing something so awful.
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son of liberty
Posts:
94
From:
anytown, USA
Registered:
6/28/06
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(4 of 10)
Aug 12, 2006 4:40 PM
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By the way, Ive maybe seen one other post that somewhat resembles my point ov view.
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son of liberty
Posts:
94
From:
anytown, USA
Registered:
6/28/06
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(3 of 10)
Aug 12, 2006 4:33 PM
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That's the crowd that this message is geared towards, actually, the "Digital immigrants" because I'm trying to tell them why they shouldn't take the easy way out. And actually I'm not as computer-experienced as you might think, but I understand why I shouldn't be a moron and put out personal info online. The people that you are talking about don't have mail (regular mail) filters, do they? Because their kids could send out personal info out through the mail to some random person nearly as easily as via the internet, and there is no such thing as a mail filter. Say a kid subscribes to Playboy or some other porn magazine via the mail. Parents aren't worried about that, are they, no. And that is why they have to know that fascist assholes (pardon the language) like Websense shouldn't be given business.
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Anne
Posts:
507
Registered:
6/26/06
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(2 of 10)
Aug 12, 2006 2:40 PM
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son of liberty, probably a lot of people who post here agree with at least some of what you're saying about filtering. I often suggest to parents that filters really work better for younger kids because teens have so many workarounds (e.g., proxy sites and services) and can access the Net in so many places and on so many devices now. For that reason, we often try to get across the idea that the hands-down best filter anyone could ever have is the one installed between their ears - that parents need to help their kids develop and fine-tune that filter before trying anything else, because it's so versatile and works with any software on any platform  .
But one thing it sounds like you're not factoring in much is the difference between digital natives like you and digital immigrants like paretns who did not grow up with the Internet and use it differently and haven't thought much about how they use it differently because they're so busy.... When you've got all that stuff to think about and you don't understand all these new products and services, much less the machines they run on, and you're hearing all this scary news about all the bad stuff on the Internet that can "ruin your kid's life" and you don't know anyone who can put it into perspective for you, you sometimes go for the "easy fix" - e.g., a filtering product - which is actually not as simple as you think and doesn't protect your kid from much, but you don't know of any alternatives.... Does this make any sense? Do you feel a bit of compassion for the digital immigrants, the vast majority of whom are trying their best, really love the digital natives at their places of residence, and really do just want to protect them? If not, that's ok.
Anne
BlogSafety co-director |
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son of liberty
Posts:
94
From:
anytown, USA
Registered:
6/28/06
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(1 of 10)
Aug 12, 2006 2:18 PM
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People, stop using filtering software on you're kids. Eventually, they'll get a scewed perspective on life and the world if you sugarcoat everything. By doing things like censoring everything bad in the world you are censoring reality itself, therefore you are weakening the nation, and how will a bunch of babies that have been fed lies that the world is all good and no bad defend this country? They won't. There is porn, there is murder, there is theft, there is genocide. Teach them that, but if you don't want you're kid to have a cold outlook on life, you need to also tell them about the good in the world, but not via fascists like Websense. If reality is censored, then nobody will be able to stand up and defend themselves if need be, and only people like Hitler and Stalin will come to power, and there will be no one to stop them. Talk to you're kids about sex, and why they should wait until marriage, and don't sugarcoat the repricussions of not doing so. If they don't learn from you, they will learn from their friends, and who would you rather have teaching you're child, you or them?
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